My husband still smokes…

I have to say, one of my excuses for not quitting sooner, was that my husband said he would never quit. I did not think I could quit without him. I thought about it many times, but every time convinced myself that there was no point if he wasn’t going to as well.

When I decided to quit, I did not tell anyone at first. I kept it to myself to see how it would go, and to make sure I was actually going to quit that time. *For those of you who have not read previous posts, I had my last cigarette on my way to the hospital while in labour with my youngest* The first person I did decide to tell after I had my baby though, was my husband. He is my best friend, and I knew that if anyone was going to support me and be happy for me that it would be him! I had tried to quit before, and was not successful. I still had his support 100% though. Our first few days at home after having the baby/quitting smoking were difficult. I wanted to fall back in to normal “routine” of course. I fought through it though. Every time my husband would go for a smoke I would almost miss those few minutes standing outside with him, just the two of us. I had no choice of course but to break the habit.

A few months went by and I was finally over the habit of going with my husband for a smoke each time. But there it was, summer time had crept up! Summer time was my favourite! I would sit outside by the pool enjoying the nice weather, socializing with my friends & my husband, and of course, smoking. We would take breaks from swimming to get out and have a smoke so that we did not accidentally get one, or even ashes in the pool. I managed to fight through it. I probably didn’t spend as much time as I should have outside because I was afraid to crave it again, but I made it through! With the nice weather, and the baby being a few months old… came date night. A night that I would typically have been very excited for, but this time was actually fairly nervous. It was the first time we were going to be out together, alone. It was the first time I was going to be in his car (which he smoked in because the kids were never in it). How was this going to go? We went to the movies, and it was raining outside, and just not a very good night. My husband asked if he could have a smoke in the car while I was driving. He said if I wasn’t ready to be THAT close to it, it was fine. I decided to go ahead and agree to it. As he lit that smoke I could feel the urges coming through my body to grab one and light up again. UNTIL I smelled that smell! Oh boy was it horrible!! At that moment I realized that no matter what I would go through, I would never have another one again. I never wanted to smell like THAT again!

If you ask my husband today, he would definitely tell you how proud he is of me. But he would also tell you a lot about his struggles throughout my decision to quit smoking. To share with you a little of what it is like for others, I will actually be interviewing my husband, and our almost 5 year old about my quitting, how they feel about it, and how it may have affected them.

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